The answer may surprise/shock/depress you. Also, in case you werent clear on this: interests dear writers, never do anything in this cover letter ever.
I will not spoil the end for you, but suffice it to say that when they do it, it is totally hot. . you will be amazed when you finally discover the totally hidden meaning of Reggies violet thunder. Please respond promptly, as I have simultaneously sent this to literally everyone in the publishing industry that I could find on the internet. . If you do not happen to be the first person to snap up the rights to violet thunder and all future sequels, i apologize. . Judging by what I think authors make, this series should totally be worth at least a million dollars. Authors Name redacted —. You may say, there is no way such a thing could possibly be real. But ask any agent or editor if theyve ever received a cover letter like this.
My story follows the adventurous life of Sir Reginald Garret Von White castle, a 900 year old katana wielding swordfighter from Prussia who, despite his great age and staggering accomplishments chooses to associate with and speak exactly like a modern day high school kid. . From the opening line i always knew that, in teh end, i would be fucked by unicorns and glitter to the mind blowing dénouement, reginald leads you through a clandestine world of classic and completely new supernatural creatures who have all chosen to masquerade. This is so a reader could easily imagine him- or herself there (violet thunder will appeal to both genders, and anyone who is or ever has gone through a trying transition to adulthood). Violet thunder begins when Reggies best friend Bob is kidnapped from the high school shower after third period gym. . Bob is a figmentationist, a person who can make anything happen that he imagines, except that it is never useful or impactful, and generally only functions when it is convenient for me, the author, to have it. . Obviously reggie isnt going to stand for this, so he sets upon a journey of discovery, where he confronts glowing magic vampires, a succubae sponsored lesbian biker gang, mean cheerleaders, the sexually repressed high school councilor who is also a troll, and many other things. In all instances Reggie starts with banter, but ends with a drawn katana and a decapitated foe. . he is also a police detective. Through twists and turns literally nobody has seen coming, reggie ends up in a final confrontation atop an incongruous Midwest skyscraper facing down his ex-girlfriend who now rides a magic unicorn who poops glitter and controls zombies. .
Should i write my ex - girlfriend a letter?
—-, author and address redacted, dear Agent / Editor, prepare to be blown away. . In your hands you hold the first four pages of my debut epic, violet thunder. . you have the truly unique opportunity to be one of the first to read a work that will undoubtedly revolutionize the publishing world. . Borrowing tropes from the epic fantasy, supernatural detective, and harlequin romance genres, i preview have crafted the first wholly original masterpiece in probably at least a century. I know quality writing, and know a lot of other people who know quality writing. . A sample chapter presented to my mothers book club was described as, and I", like nothing they had ever read before. . my high school English teacher told me that I should submit it right away, even though i only shared the first half of the first draft.
Now, i understand that conventionally you are expecting to see the first five pages. . I havent done that. . Instead i am sending the first four, so convinced am I that what you hold in your (no doubt trembling) hands is 20 better than anything you have ever read. . Now, i am intimately robot familiar with everything you publish, but to avoid embarrassing any of your other authors I will not name names. . Suffice it to say that when you finish violet thunder it is very likely that you will forget them, and will likely shit joy and barf rainbows.
Dawn Ostroff, new York city, may 2009. In looking at current hits like gossip girl and 90210, not to mention upcoming trashfests melrose place and the beautiful life, this tv addict cant seem to shake the feeling that youve completely lost touch with your networks roots. That thought became all the more apparent after spending this past weekend enjoying the emotional roller-coaster that was everwoods second season. Seriously, whats happened to the once proud cw once home to gilmore girls, felicity and even 7th heaven, each of which, in their own ways, defined outstanding television. These shows entertained, enlightened and surprised us with their ability to illicit laughter, summon up tears and even, on occasion, teach us a thing or two about ourselves and the world in which we live.
Say what you will about the off-charts-preachiness of reverend Camden and his 7th heaven flock, but creator Brenda hampton raised more social issues than anyone since the folks behind the abc afterschool Specials we all grew. Conversely, the only thing the current crop of cw shows seem interested in raising are their characters hemlines and/or levels of alcohol and drug consumption. Dont get me wrong; Its not as if I have anything against mindless entertainment per. (I am, after-all a tv addict!) However, i cant help but wonder why the cw has exiled every positive role model — including Rory gilmore, felicity porter and Ephram Brown — in favor of badly-behaving bitches like blair Waldorf and naomi Clark or horny hounddogs. If the trash-talking backstabbers on americas next top model are the closest thing youve got to aspirational characters, your network is in trouble. Xoxo, the tv addict. As a preface: I did not write this. I might have exploded had I tried.
Apology, letter to, my, ex, girlfriend
Keep in mind that the advice good from friends in family are typically at the top of this list and what worked for your aunt and uncle probably won't work for you. This is your life, your relationship and your heart that we're talking about here. While you might be tempted to want to talk about your breakup with anyone and everyone and get their advice on what you should do to get your ex back usually people are repelled by constant talk about your. So keep this to yourself. Because you do know that there is a very good chance that your ex is in contact with your friends and family under the pretense of "checking on you" and if your ex catches wind of the fact that you still want them back. Click here to see how you can get that second chance and get your ex back. Discover how you can shorten the no contact rule down to nothing and get your ex back guaranteed.
Some experts suggest that you take up a hobby or hang out with friends or family to allow the time to pass more quickly and make you feel better. While this is all true and time does heal all wounds, if you are really serious about getting your ex the back you're really going to be pretty busy. Maybe even too busy to think of what your ex is doing, what went wrong in your relationship or even be too upset about the breakup. So this is somewhat true. The important part of what the no contact rule will give you is time to heal yourself, get your head together and come up with a plan that you can see working to get your ex back. While part of that plan includes rebuilding your confidence the vast majority of your plan should include methods that have been shown to work. There is a ton of advice out there that is quite lame and which can actually destroy any chance that you might have of getting your ex back.
upon how long it takes you to come up with a good solid plan to get your ex back including what you're going to say, how you're going to say it and knowing what your attitude should be like towards your. It is a mistake to place a flat one month moratorium on contact with your ex just become someone says. This isn't and shouldn't be a hard and fast rule. After all, if you and your ex just had a small spat and you go off and stop communicating with your ex for a month, which is typically the standard rule, your ex is going to think that you are done with them. It could be that after two days your ex is ready to talk to you again and if you can pull yourself together in that amount of time and you have your wits about you it is possible to get your ex back that quick. Of course, if you're still a wreck and you aren't really quite sure of how to handle yourself then you could make things worse and wind up making the breakup worse! What to do - many people think that the no contact rule is just about putting some time and distance between themselves and their.
Just leave your ex alone and hope and pray that they come back to you. How is that supposed to work? What's to keep your ex from thinking that you have moved on and that you don't really care any more? The problem is that most people, even those advising the use of the no contact rule to get your ex back, don't understand how it's supposed to be used and what it's supposed to accomplish. This dandy piece of advice is just doled out as a necessary part of getting an ex back without much explanation of what its purpose is and what it should accomplish. Without this information all you are doing is dropping off your ex's radar hoping that something will happen to miraculously change your ex's mind. Sorry to say but chances are slim to none of this happening in most cases or than the most mundane of breakups. Time - so how long should the no contact rule be used before it is ok to get back in touch with your ex?
Try writing, letters to, get, your, ex, back
Your heartbroken and stressed out since your ex broke up with you and for you the only thing that you can think of that will end your pain is to get your ex back. Day and night you try to think of what you can do and what you might say to change your ex's mind and persuade your ex to come back to you. You may have even tried talking with them, being nice to your ex, promising to change and even telling your ex to go take a hike in a moment of frustration. You may have tried writing a heart felt love letter or even telling your ex that you still love them and always will. But nothing seems to be able to change your ex's mind and you wonder what you should do next. The no contact Rule - you have probably heard of the no contact rule or even tried following this rule in hopes that it would help you to get your ex back. Much to your dismay nothing happened. Maybe your ex even said that they were happy that you weren't contacting them any longer, which broke your heart all over again. Some wonderful method for getting your ex back, don't desk you think?